Topic 1: Conflict in Our Culture
Directions: In a comment, respond to one of the prompts below in 300+ typed words. Also be sure to respond to a classmate's comment so that we can keep our classroom conversation going.
Option 1: Most people have witnessed a friendship fall apart, a family divide, or a global tragedy that spawns feuds that last for several decades. Where do you think hatred begins? What measures do you think can be taken to resolve arguments and alleviate hatred? Cite a feud you have witnessed as evidence to support your argument.
Option 2: In his poem "Mending Wall," Robert Frost repeats the old adage "good fences make good neighbors." The characters in the poem have a stone wall--a literal boundary--between their homes. What types of boundaries do you think need to exist to maintain healthy relationships? Cite examples from your friendships and your relationships with family members to support your argument.
Be sure to answer all parts of the question fully. Your comment/response to my prompt should be 300+ words. Your comment/response to a friend should be 50+ words. Your blog entries must be completed by 11:59 pm on October 7, 2012.
I think hatred begins when the heart closes due to ignorance. Where people get irritated and annoyed so much that it triggers something in their head, that gives a person a burning feeling inside like a fire was lit, however it‘s not a good fire. I think the measures that can be taken to resolve alleviate hatred or arguments between people is realizing that someone was wrong. Also, another way to resolve arguments is that they can completely avoid each other. A "bad mommy" story may result in a lifelong hatred of women. A bad job can mean anticipating every work situation will be undesirable. When women laughs saying "All men are pigs," there’s bound to be a painful memory behind that statement. Hate stories, are always factually wrong. All men are not pigs. Jews do not have all the money. All Muslims are not terrorists. All Christians do not vote for conservative political candidates. Not everything you hear is true. Hitler said that Jews where to blame for money lose that hey had the money, but they didn’t. However everyone nonjew believed him so they started killing Jews. Now before 9/11 everyone didn’t discriminate against Muslims, and after 9/11 every Muslim is a terrorist. Hatred for people who did nothing, never did anything to be hated or discriminated, just wanting to fit in and be liked just alittle. They just want to have a bit or respect from others. However, until all governments, all nations, all people are committed to knowing the truth, it is likely that wars and hate crimes will continue.
ReplyDeleteIf I wish for hatred to cease, I must unceasingly look to my own hateful impulses, however seemingly insignificant, and meet them with understanding. So, for now, "Let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with me."
I like what you said about there being discrimination and hatred because ignorant people who dont understand thats its only the extremists and radicals who do destructive terroristic things as aposed to them believing that every muslim being a terrorist. Oh and what did you mean about a bad mommy story? Did you mean how in Akward when Jenna's mom wrote her that not and then she posted it on her blog? LOL jk
DeleteBrianna, I really liked this story. I likes how you stated every religion and there "wrong doing". I loved how you put that after 9/11 all muslims are terrorist and Hitler blames the jews for eerything. Also the fact that when a woman says something aboutr men that theres a story behind that statement. Also when you did write about the bad mommy tory i also thought about Jenna in Awkward to.
DeleteI really liked how you added all of the historical examples and how it really pulled the whole thing together. The examples about stereotyping of Muslims and 9/11 and Hitler really does show the false hatred for people and the ignorance of them. It's sad that hatred would come from falsly accusing people like that. All in all, really strong points.
DeleteBrianna, I am very impressed with your response. You really tried to approach this topic from a societal and historical standpoint. The connections you made were thought-provoking and relevant. I look forward to your next blog entry. P.S. I wish I knew who Jenna from Awkward was.
DeleteOption 1 and 2 combined.
ReplyDeleteHatred can be caused when somebody is unsure about or dislikes something or someone. And sometimes people hate everything because they have nothing to live for and they are old, or even just sick of life. Something everybody need in life is a friend or friends and when you don’t have any friends or family then you don’t have anything to live for, and a lot of precious friendships can just be lost. I think that friend ships fall apart when people just stop understanding each other. Sometimes people outgrow each other and there is nothing you can do about that. Sometimes people mature quicker than others and grow up faster than others. And things can get confusing in a friendship causing you to maybe not trust somebody and want them out of your life. Or maybe you feel they are a bad influence on you or others, but in every friend ship there is a line, and you don’t cross that line. Every friendship is unique because maybe you like some body for there personality or there good listening skills or maybe you think they’re just an all around good friend. All the same with modern day societies high standards you could easily be embarrassed by what your friend does or says and they might even not know. You also might want a little more out of your friendship, maybe a relationship and the other person might not want that and telling them could really damage the relationship maybe even beyond repair. There is a show called guy code and its funny, but there was this episode that talked about how friend operate with a girlfriend in the group, and it was going on at one point about how if your girlfriend doesn’t like your friends than she might not be the girl for you. But what I got out of that is that your best friends are basically you defined in a different way. And if you and your friends don’t get along something is happening to one of you, and its best to try and figure who it is before you lose everything. Sometimes you might not even know who your best friend is until somebody else says something like “Yo who’s that guy your always hanging out with and talking to?” and then it hits you and your like . Usually if you don’t know somebody you don’t really pay attention to them and you don’t think any thing of them, but when that person used to be your best friend you friken hate them. Then you might start talking about them behind them behind their back and that’s how problems start. If you have a problem with somebody you talk to them not about them because they would rather hear it from you not from somebody else who heard it from somebody else. And that’s where hatred can come from mixed emotion, disappointment, anger, rejection and loss even of something. One friendship can go so far and make that much of a difference.
Kevin, I think this response went off topic a bit. In order to better complete your next blog, try to focus on answering every question individually. However, I must add that I liked your take on the Guy Code episode. I think the concept of our friends being different variations of ourselves is very interesting. I enjoyed reading your thoughts and opinions. Also, please try to use scholarly, academic appropriate language in the blogs; "friken" is not the most becoming word for an intelligent young man like yourself.
DeleteHatred begins with a bad first impression. Might be what they said to you or how they interacted with you. Hatred is a very strong word and people usually wont forget about it, it can feud for as long as they remember it. I grew up with parents who always fought and argued, but they didn’t hate each other. They are now divorced because they fought too much and its not something someone should go through. Resolving an argument takes apologies and honesty. The bigger person should step up and admit that they did the wrong thing or the wrong decision. Nobody hates anybody, it can seem that way but they actually dislike them because hatred is never going to be forgotten. If you tell somebody you hate them they will always remember that, so don’t try to apologize later. Hatred can break a friend relation, a marriage relationship, a girlfriend, or anything else. Hatred is strong and its funny that a word can ruin a lot of things in life. A couple could fight all day but in there minds they don’t hate each other they are just having different opinions on a subject. Resolving an argument actually can make people more closer or get to know each more mentally. They will get to know there opinions on things and will reduce arguments by a lot. Its funny to thing that arguing can get people closer, getting to know each other more, and reduce arguments. So a lot of people can fight, or even dislike each other but hatred does not happen. So people who have dislikes or arguments are usually a good long term requirement that needs to happen. It will not only help people in there life but get people closer and resolve bad conflicts.
ReplyDeletejust a way of life. People come and people go, it happens everyday, everywhere. Hatred mainly begins in the hard, because in order to hate someone, you must love them first. There will be times where you come across the type of hatred, and you dont know why its there, but thats alright. In order to ressolve most the problems, you can be civil and work it out the best you can. If you guys are true friends, then you wont let anything come between such a good friendship. For example, my grandma and grandpa had been together for 45 years. They have been through a lot of problems, even a little seperation for awhile, but they didnt let anything break them down. They set aside all their differences and made it work not only for them, but for the family. All of us would honestly be crushed if what they had together was ruined because they are all we know as good people.. Till this day, they are still together going strong.
DeleteI agree with what you said about "resolving an arguement actually can make people closer". I think if they take the time to talk through whatever is bothering them, they have a chance at becomming better friends. Arguements usually end up getting so out of hand that people take the easy way out and walk away from something that is important in their lives.
DeleteJordan, I liked that you touched upon the difference between hatred and a difference of opinions. I think it is easy to jump to the conclusion that in order to have a big, blowout argument, two people must hate each other, when in fact, I believe more often than not that arguments stem not from hatred but from a desire to be heard. Nice work.
DeleteI think hatred can really start from anything. You can hate someone for anything they do. Hatred can start from a stupid comment your friend made at lunch one day to a family member saying something. You can have hatred for someone but I think you can’t truly hate someone for doing something like saying something. For example my family and I went on a family vacation for Christmas last year. We went with my family my 2 aunts and uncles and my 3 cousins. There was this whole brawl about not having my 4th cousin there and all this stupid stuff. Then there was a problem about my brother saying something that offended my Aunt and Uncle. My Aunt and Uncle are very religious and take going to church every Sunday and every holiday very seriously. My brother made a statement that we don’t really go to church that much unless it’s a Christmas, then made a not so appreciated joke to my family. My aunt and uncle got really mad at our family for this because we told them about 2 years ago we got to church almost every weekend. When in reality we did go every weekend and we just decided to stop going for personal reasons. We still do go to church but just not as much as my family wants us to. Some measurement like just saying you’re sorry and stating that you were wrong can make all of a difference. Sometimes people just need to hear that that one person or people were wrong and want an apology. Sometimes it may not be the best idea for you but for that person it can mean a lot. Especially if that person can hold a grudge. As Jim Morrison once said “Hatred is a very underestimated emotion”
ReplyDeleteI think that at the end of you story the quote that you put was very good and describes everything. I do think that hatred is a underestimated emotion because people dont think that it can ever happen to them. When it does happen to them they dont know what to do because they never thought it could happen and they thought there life will be perfect, that quote can relate to my uncle also who had a divorce. Otherwise that was a very good story
DeleteSusannah I really likethe quote at the end of your story. and I also liked how you described every thing. Alos that I agree with you hated can start fom anything. But their is normally a reason when someone starts hating someon. And their is normally a sitution that happened orsome thing in their life. But I really liked your story andit wasvery good.
DeleteSusannah, I liked how you used a personal example. It makes it clear that you understood the question. It also made the situation relate to other people. I agree that hatred can start with anything and stupid things at that. There was nothing I that made me think negative about your entry and I thought that it was really good.
DeleteSusannah, I agree with you that the power of an apology is sometimes enough to end hatred. I think that all too often, we get caught up in trying to prove how right we are to others that we forget to stop, check ourselves, and consider the effects our actions can have on others. Thank you for sharing your story. I also loved the Jim Morrison quote...are you a Doors fan?
DeleteMost people have witnessed a friendship fall apart, a family divide, or a global tragedy that spawns feuds that last for several decades. This all makes hatred come into play because people want to have a happy life and they would blame whoever did this for their terrible life that was about to begin. This has happened in my family. When my Uncle was young he was very interested into this girl named Diane. They always fought and nobody in our family or her family liked her that much even her mother!! She was a big trouble maker and she was more interested in herself than anybody else. One day my Uncle went to the hospital to get surgery and the doctor made him paralyzed. After that and spending a lot of money with no hope they got a divorce. Diane didn’t care about him that much in my eyes you can see it in all the parties we have had she didn’t care about him. Before then they spent a lot of money to on what she wanted so also in my eyes she was using him. My uncle really cared about my aunt and he wanted her to have a happy life because he really liked her and he didn’t want his life to be ruined so he did anything to save this relationship. This was the relationship between my Uncle and my Aunt and how it fell apart. Another example I had was when my parents started to fight a lot and thought they were going to break up and I was so worried about that because I didn’t want my family to fall apart. Then they decided they didn’t want that to so they went to some guy to get help and after that it went nice and smooth and now they are living together without fighting and having a happy life.
ReplyDeleteNick, thank you for sharing your stories. I am sorry to hear the sad story you shared about your aunt and uncle, but I am happy to hear that things are going well for your immediate family. While I feel your blog response strayed a bit in focus, I did notice that you stated that your parents talked to someone in an effort to stop fighting. I think that sometimes involving a third party can be helpful...most of the time when people argue, they are only able to see their side of the situation. As a result, having an unbiased set of eyes and ears to sort matters out can help.
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ReplyDeleteI believe in every relationship their needs to be bounties. Not only mental bounties but also physical, the bounties are set so that no one will get hurt. If there are no bounties if two people get into a fight and they have no bounties they can both get hurt very badly. But they if those people had a mental and physical bounties they would have not gotten into the fight and would not get hurt. So all in all I am saying that people need mental and physical bounties so no one can get hurt. For example my best friend and I can get into fights sometimes. But we don’t yell at each other. We would just not talk to the other one, and the fight will be over in like five minutes because we have bounties. Also that we do not like to yell at each other because if we yell it will only make the situation much worse and neither of us want that even if we are mad at each other. But if people don’t have bounties especially in family because a lot of children are being abused in society today because family’s don’t have bounties, and as a result for that the children have to pay for that. The children will never forget that because the parents have no bounties and do not care what happens to them than hen those kids grow up they will have the same problem and do the same thing to other people that their parents did them. But there is always those children who have the very high bounties that they will never trust anyone and will not let anyone threw those bounties and fell alone and will be alone because of what their parents did to them. All in all bounties are need in any and all relationships to stay safe and have a long and happy friendship and relationship.
Jess, a couple of times your response went off topic. In order to better complete your next blog, try to focus on answering all parts of the question individually. That said, I enjoyed reading about your relationship with your friend. I think it is smart that you both cool down before speaking to each other regarding matters that make you both angry. I also thought your observations about children and trust were very intriguing. Hatred can certainly stem from a lack of trust.
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ReplyDeleteTo maintain a healthy relationship, I don't think there has to be many boundaries. I think that if there had to be a main thing to focus on, it would ultimately be trust and being a loyal, good-hearted friend to that person. There will always have to be space between two friends, because I think that is an easy way to show trust, and by showing that, that would usually mean the same thing for the other person. By showing the other person that, it show a lot of trust and will maintain that relationaship. I also think that if you really want to be friends with someone, then you need to stay by them no matter what, and your friend would do the same. For example, I've stuck up for my friends and family because they really needed it at times, and vice-versa. This would really show that you want to be friendly with this person. You should try and keep space, but you also don't want to be that distant, because that is another way to weaken a bond. An example is when my aunt and cousins moved to Pennsylvania and I didn't hear from them as much. I tried to stay close and showed that I wanted to see them, and I often heard from them. Now, I still try and maintain that friendly lifestyle that I tried to establish in the first place. I think you don't need many boundaries to keep a healthy relationship going, as much as you only need to be friendly to keep the relationship going. Trust and loyalty would probably be the first priority in a friendship and relationship with friends and family.
ReplyDeleteVery nice, Brandon! Trust and loyalty are most definitely important parts of the foundations on which friendships and relationships are built. I agree that sometimes having too many personal boundaries can be mistaken for a desire for distance. Nice work.
DeleteIn my opinoin, I think everyone has hatred in them at some point in their life. It is an emotion that we all develope as we grow up. When we are little, it's usually something so small like hating vegetables, or sharing toys. As we get older, it seems to grow more and more. From hating to wake up early for school or doing homework, to having an arguement with another person that gets so bad that we feel we hate them. I think there are many different ways to deal with the feelings that go with hatred, that if people took the time to stop and think before they reacted, hatred would be less and less in the world. For instance, when you feel anger build up if you are in an arguement with someone, you can take a few seconds and think about what you are going to say back to something mean, and you might be able to come up with an answer to calm the situation instead of making it esculate. A few years ago, my mom and one of her best friends got into a really bad fight over something that started out really being no big deal. They let it go on for too long, and it ended up being something so rediculous that it broke up the friendship, and somehow turned into hatred. Words were said that were hurtful, and probably not meant, when all they had to do was talk it out and try and fix it. Now, they don't talk to one another and we don't get to see them anymore. All it would have taken was a simple phone call to say, "I'm sorry this got so out of hand. How can we fix the problem and work through it?"
ReplyDeletei agree when you said it started off as when we were little until we get older
DeleteJosh, I thought your ideas about our capacity for hatred increasing as we mature were very interesting. Why do you think that is? Your blog entry was very thoughtful and intriguing.
DeleteA friendship falls apart. A family divides and a global tragedy forms a feud that lasts for several decades unfortunately most people have witnessed these things at least once in their lifetime. Witnessing these tragedies can make someone feel that this could happen to them and that in life you never truly know who you can trust and who could make all your dreams come crashing down. Life is short and should be enjoyed so examining why hatred starts is an important step in learning how to avoid it and live a happy life. So where does hatred start?
ReplyDeleteOne example of how hatred begins is when people start to believe things that aren’t true about other people someone may start a rumor that one person is taking about another but in reality it is not happening. However, the person who thinks they are being talked about gets angry and the person who is being lied about gets angry too. The problem begins when instead of talking and getting to the root of the problem people immediately distrust and dislike one another.
A measure that should be taken in order to rebuild these broken friendships or relationships is communication. Instead of hearing and believing things from other people the offended parties should go to to that person and directly discuss with them the issues at hand. Once discussed and resolved they can begin in rebuilding there friendship.
A feud that I have personalty witnessed was between two individuals where things where said about one another by parties uninvolved. The rumors spread by the uninvolved parties were believed by both individuals being talked about. Never confronting one other the feud began to grow until the entire friendship fell apart. This friendship was never rebuilt and that goes to show that you have to be careful in what you believe and how you deal with the situations that you are faced with throughout your life.
Nice work, Amelia! You answered all parts of the question in a clear and concise way. Your blog entry was thoughtful and it was clear that you put a lot of heart into your writing.
DeleteI truthfully believe hatred begins when friends or family do things that they know you don't accept of. Hatred also can begin where someone hurts you in a way of something that is close to you and important. They intrude your privacy and affect you In some way can cause hatred in some manner. If a family member smokes or does drugs you try to help them. If they try to get you to do them you would say no but because they are already addicted it is hard to stop. They will get other people into drugs and then it will cause a feeling of true hatred unless you are an addict of a sort. The friendship may fall apart because you know what they are doing is wrong and you think that they shouldn't be doing that. Everybody can be racist. Some are racist because they believe whites are higher than blacks or African Americans. There is also religion hatred. Some people think religion is uncalled for and it causes hatred. The mix of religions in different countries is tearing the world apart. Hatred could also be based on sexual orientation if they are homo-sexual or even bi-sexual. They are discriminated and others hate them and many times hate crimes are committed. These are many of the kinds of hatred in our American society. Unfortunately, workplace discrimination still occurs in today's society despite federal, state and local employment laws that prohibit discriminatory treatment, but this still doesn't stop discrimination not in the work place. How about in schools and sports teams?
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ReplyDeleteIn high school you meet people that you will never forget. Some of those memories may be positive, and many may be negative. You will encounter love and unfortunately you will encounter hate. With all of the different personalities and everyone trying to be their own person, it is extremely hard for everyone to get along. You have to hope you meet the right people and if you are lucky enough they will be lifelong friends. But, along the way we will all be tricked by people and think they are something they are not. I feel this is how hatred begins. When you are betrayed and hurt by someone or something you trusted and believed in, it hurts and you will never feel the same about them again. People like me, get very protective over themselves and the people they love. I will hate anyone that crosses me, my family, or friends.
About two years ago my sister's friend came and changed our family's life. We really did not think anything of it, we just thought of it as a new friend. When we actually started having her around more she started becoming a bigger part of our family, she became our sister. We had her back throughout everything no matter what it was and she always had ours. She practically lived at our house and we all did everything together. Since she was always here it seemed it was only right for us to throw her a surprise party for her eighteenth birthday. We thought it would make her happy, and so it did. That was also the night her and her current boyfriend started dating, and it had also been the night our friendship started to disappear. From her car being parked out side of our house every day, it dwindled down to a couple weeks, months, and soon not at all.
Like every stupid teenage girl does at some point in her life, she left the people that care about her behind for a boy who treats her like a piece of dirt. Whenever he did not want her that is when she would come around, and that is when we would fall for her tricks. She made it sound like she would always be there for us no matter what, and after having one of the hardest years in our family, she was distant and cold. She would lie to Alexa and say she would come over, but just stay at her boyfriends house and ignore her. She always had a way of manipulating her and also my family. Eventually, it was time to give up, we could not fight the fact that she did not care anymore, none of us made an effort to see her all summer.
In August, when it was time for her to leave for college, her boyfriend broke up with her. He was not happy anymore, which means she ended back at our house. She came over that day to say her goodbyes and she went off to Kutztown, where we thought she would stay for a while. I really wish I could say I was sad that day but I really could have cared less. I was never more happy in my life. Knowing that she would not be there anymore to play with my mind, and act like she cared when she really did not at all was a sigh of relief. Sure enough, her and the boyfriend got back together and she comes home every single weekend to see him, neither of us give any effort to see each other or even communicate.
On Friday, her boyfriend and his friend attacked my family and I on a social networking site. She sat back and did nothing at all. She knows all of our insecurities and she let her boyfriend pick out all of them and insult us. I can truly say that I absolutely hate the both of them and I can never forgive them. She is now off at college while he stays home and does nothing with his life. All I have to say is that karma will come around to the both of them, and she will never meet anyone who cares for her as much as my family did. Hate is a strong word, but the words he used to make my sisters and I feel like nothing were even stronger. People who intentionally hurt people is what causes hate in this world.
Victoria, how could anyone use a social forum to insult my dear Padula? Thank you for bravely sharing this experience. I am inclined to agree with you that hatred can stem from deception. I wonder what deeply buried emotions lead people to deceive their own friends. I think your beliefs regarding karma are a healthy way to alleviate hateful feelings; focusing on our own health, happiness, and accomplishments and allowing life to take its course rather than reacting angrily is a smart move. Nice job.
Deletemany people i know have witnessed a friendship fall apart, a family divide, or a global tragedy that spawns feuds that last for several decades. However i have too and i believe that hatred begins in the begining of the argument or disagreement but i think hatred crosses the line from an argument to somthing much more serious like a loss of a friendship ,division of a family or a tragic global matter. The measures that could be taken to prevent arguments or altercations are walking away from a premeditated arguement or action before it actually happens.many times people have told me they listen to music to alliviate hatred inhis fueds or her life. i have wittnessed many fueds in my life for instince two fellow classmates/friends got into an argument over a boy name lundyn. one of the classmates accused the other of trying to get wit her man and began a huge argument over facebook. after a couple of days of bickering and he said she said they confronted eachotther in school.wich lead to fight later in the day about dissmissal time for central regional highschool. punches where thrown and faces were brused. the fight was over in about five minutes. And ever since then a friendship has fallin apart and has been rough around the edges ever since that day of the altercation between the two friends oveover one boy. That day one of the two girls decided to try to avoid hatred by making up with her former friend but that never seemed to happen between the two. so i believe that all conflict can be resolved unless pushed to the ultimate extent
ReplyDeleteTiffany, thank you for sharing your story. I agree with you that listening to music or just turning our focus inward can be a great way to alleviate hateful feelings. I see that you have taken a step back from the "he said, she said" situation and sought to gain some perspective, and for that I am proud of you. Nice work.
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